Monday, August 23, 2010

My mom-i-versary

9 years ago today I was holding my first baby in my arms. Looking into her huge blue eyes completely freaked-out, yet enchanted. Today Grace turns 9 years old.

All my kids love their birthdays and of course we love to celebrate their special days. But Grace’s birthday is different. It’s special. Because it is the anniversary of the day I became a mom. A role I always assumed I would eventually have – although perhaps not so young. I had no idea how it alter the course of my life – significantly – for the years that followed… I couldn’t fathom the blessings I have been given.

Her birthday always makes me feel a bit nostalgic, almost sad, wistful. Although only 9, she is already losing shades of childhood innocence. This will be her first Christmas without believing in the full “Christmas magic” (so to speak). And although she’s a friend to everyone she meet, she’s already started to see how cruel children can be, even to their “friends.” She sees injustice and inequity and it breaks her heart – and her broken heart breaks mine.

Fortunately, for me, she’s not afraid to still be my little girl. She woke up early this morning (well, early for her), before I had left for work. And, like she used to so many years ago, she lifted her arms up to me. I picked her up and held her close. She nestled her head under my chin with a happy sigh.

And my heart was happy.

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